Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
