last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
