Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
