only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
