ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
