ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
