And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
