i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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