woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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