In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Randomize
