He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
