Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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