Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
