i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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