they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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