To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
