Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Randomize
