Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
