you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
