I need help removing her.
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize
