and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize