1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
