I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
