I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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