I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
Randomize