Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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