So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Randomize
