she woke up with a sticky ear
one might say we're banned from that church
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
