I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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