Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
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