My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Randomize
