He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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