clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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