Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
jump out the window naked night went bad
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