This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
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