do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
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