I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
