Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
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