when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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