That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
