Well douche your snatch and let's go!
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
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