I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
