I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
