Christians are straight up FREAKS
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
