Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Randomize
