i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
