so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
