Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
