Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
