Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
